It's been quite some time since my last blog, and I apologize for leaving both my readers in suspense.
In the last blog, I left you with this "After I got back to Colorado Springs, I was surprised that I actually wasn't doing so shabby up here as well. My first two runs back in Colorado, I averaged 9-9.5 minute miles. I was thoroughly proud of myself...and then it happened."
My third run while I was back in Colorado was a 7 mile run. It was going very well for the first two miles and then my legs started to tighten up. Since I have gotten quite good at allowing myself to stop if I need to, I decided to take a short break to stretch. After stretching, I continued the run, and completed the final 5 miles without needing to stop.
I was pretty excited that I was doing so well after having been back in Colorado for only a few days. When I got home, I stretched, and started to draw a cold bath (since that's a good thing to do after longer runs.) As I was walked down the stairs, all of a sudden, I felt a shooting pain in my left knee.
I was pretty shocked and confused at first. It came out of no where. There was no dull pain to indicate that more pain was coming. I hadn't tweaked it, twisted it, or otherwise hurt it on the run. I didn't know what the deal was, so I decided to take the cold bath and not worry about it. It was probably nothing.
The next day, still hurting. The day after that, not any better and not any worse. I iced it, I heated it, I did all the right things, but no change. It was not bad enough to see a doctor (yet), but bad enough to keep me from running. I started doing research.
I found a few possible explanations, but the most likely was Chondromalacia Patella, commonly known as "runner's knee". http://orthopedics.about.com/cs/patelladisorders/a/chondromalacia_2.htm
This is the passage that made it really hit home:
"Does this sound like your situation?
You're a self-proclaimed athlete--certainly in shape, but not quite a professional runner/cyclist/etc. You decide to train for the local 10-mile race, or perhaps even a marathon, maybe you're a cyclist who is riding more than usual. Your knee starts to give you trouble, so you see your doctor and are diagnosed with chondromalacia."
The answer was yes...well, all except the doctor part because I hadn't been. The problem was, the recommendation for treatment is several weeks of rest, and then slowly rehabilitating it with leg exercises. I didn't have that kind of time.
I decided if it got any worse, I'd go see a doctor. It never got worse, only stayed the same. I had finally resolved to go see a doctor (about 3 weeks later), when all of a sudden it started getting better. I was very excited, but that didn't change the fact that I had already missed 3 weeks and would undoubtedly miss 2-3 more. I became pretty sure that my dream of running this marathon had been shattered. I was positive that I wasn't going to be able to run the full marathon and pretty sure I wasn't going to be able to run the half either.
I called James to tell him the bad news, and he wasn't nearly as disappointed as I had thought he would be. He hoped that I would be able to run the half marathon and if not, no big deal. That was a relief.
A week or so later, I decided to get a knee brace and run a local 5k. I figured if I could run 3 miles I might be able to get back into the training and at least do the half-marathon. I was a little worried that I was biting off more than I could chew starting back with 3.1 miles, but I went for it anyway.
It went great! I didn't break any speed records or anything, but I ran the whole thing and my knee didn't hurt. Maybe the half was in my sights after all.
At a certain point, James decided he simply had too much on his plate to train for a marathon, so he decided to do the half as well. It looked like all three of us (me, James, and my sister) were going to be doing the half, if my knee was up for it.
I started running 3 miles a few times a week to ease back into it, all while wearing the brace. 3 or 4 runs later, guess what. The other knee started having the same problem. I couldn't believe it. I was devastated.
Throughout this whole marathon process, I've been seeking God. When the injuries happened, it was no different. I kept praying and asking God his purpose in all of it. I was frustrated, hurt, angry, etc. I prayed for healing and it didn't come. Clearly God had a lesson for me to learn in all of it, I just didn't know what it was.
I couldn't even bring myself to go to the gym and ride a bike (that actually hurt my knee too) or swim or anything. I knew that there were things I could do to keep my fitness level up, but I was done. I was out. I was defeated.
I couldn't stay down about it for long, I started swimming and doing other cross-training exercises, but it wasn't the same. I wanted to run.
Then I found something out. My sister, although she has been training diligently since November, was never really planning on running the entire half marathon. She set her goals to walk/run the 13.1. Maybe I would just walk/run it with her. If my knee hurt, I'd walk. Sounded like a good plan.
I talked to James the other day. He knew that my knee was still bothering me and said "so what are you planning on doing?" I told him the plan, and he said "look man...if we have to walk the thing, we'll walk it."
That's when it all became clear. This marathon was never about finishing. It was about pushing myself and encouraging others to do the same. It was about setting a goal, and going for it, no matter the outcome. It was about risking. It was about perseverance. It was about striving for excellence but being content with less.
By the time that I arrive in Atlanta for the race, it will be about spending time with one of my best friends and my sister. I can't wait.
God knows what we need...whether we do, or not.
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