GA Lottery Commercial

Ok...so maybe I haven't posted in a while...and by a while, I mean 2 years. Yikes.

I could say I've been too busy...but that's just ridiculous. I could say I forgot my password, but they have ways of resetting those these days. Aliens stole my computer? naw...that's no good. I guess there's really no excuse for it. My apologies to the 3 people who have read this thing in the past.

I have been rather busy, which is a good thing.

Since my last post (way back in 2011), I've moved 3 times (still in Atlanta), gotten an Agent (Houghton Talent...love them), taken acting classes, gotten new headshots, and even booked some professional acting jobs! It's been a wild ride. And it hasn't been easy.

Two (plus) years have passed since my entrance into the film industry. I've learned a LOT. Opportunities have come and gone. I've worked behind the scenes, auditioned for countless projects, and booked a few. But I must admit...the rejection of it all, will get to you from time to time. There's only so many times a person can hear "no" before eventually they throw their hands in the air and say "WHAT's THE DEAL?!"

As far as I could tell, I was doing almost everything right! Headshots, check. Resume, check. Acting classes, check. Agent, check. Maybe it was my acting skills? Was I even any good at acting? Was I simply ignoring all the warning signs? Was I one of those singer's on American Idol auditions who have an extremely false sense of their abilities?

And yet, I could not deny the positive response I was getting from people that HIRE actors. It seemed that I could handle the work, and yet I still wasn't booking. It was the most frustrating thing in the world.

The more I waited, the more clear it was...God had me in a season of Preparation. In the same way a Goldsmith purifies Gold, God was putting me in the fire, taking me out periodically, scraping the impurities off the top, and then putting me back in. Refining. It's exhausting.

So...after 2 years of this...I finally reached the end of my rope. I wanted to be where God wanted me to be, and do what He wanted me doing, but I could NOT handle this anymore. I needed affirmation. More than that...I needed confirmation. So I prayed.

"God...if you want me to act. To be an actor...like...for my job. I asking you to provide a professional acting job that pays over (X) amount of dollars...by the end of the month. Otherwise I'm going to start looking for full-time jobs. This is not an ultimatum. If you want to show me in some other way that this is where you want me...that's fine. If by the end of the month I don't book anything, and I start looking for full-time jobs, and you want to turn me back around, feel free to slam the doors in my face. I'm just letting you know...If I don't book a professional acting job that pays over (X) amount of dollars by the end of the month...this is the direction I'm headed."

And then we wait. 

Every day I prayed again "Lord, thank you for your answer". Because even the absence of an answer is an answer in this instance.

I didn't really have that many auditions that month. It made me nervous. I didn't want to quit. I just wanted all of this to work. I wanted this to be what God wanted me doing. But either way...I was looking forward to having an answer. Either I would continue acting, or finally feel free to move on to something else.

On October 22nd, I had an audition for a commercial. I almost couldn't go, but I made it work. Then, I waited in the waiting room for over an HOUR...watching people go in the audition room in groups of 4, and spend 10-15 minutes in there. I was prepared to spend that much time in the room as well.

Finally they called me in with 3 others. We were to play out the scene. They told us "feel free to improvise..." and one of the actors really took that to heart. It was quite surprising, how little of the actual script he stuck to. It was confusing, but I managed to say 2 of my 3 lines in the process.

Then the casting director stopped us. "Ok great...thanks Steven...we're done with you".

My inner monologue: "um...what?! are you kidding me? That's it?! That guy screwed me up! I want to do it again"
What I said on the outside: "ok...thank you."

Me in the car: "What the heck happened there? what a waste of time! I didn't even say the last line! All those other people were in there for 15 minutes...I was in and out in 3. This sucks."

Eventually I got to a point of resolution. I determined that they knew something when I walked into the room. Either "Absolutely" or "Absolutely not"....more likely the latter.

2 days later, I got a callback. Unbelievable. It was one of the worst auditions I've ever had. Or so I thought.

Went to the callback, it was a very similar experience, but judging by the first time, I resigned that I pretty much don't know anything about how this is going to go.

2 days later...I'm on first refusal. Which means, that production has "dibs" on me for the shoot date. They asked if I could be at a fitting on Friday. I could not. I was in Nashville for my best friend's wedding...and I was the best man. I was, however, available for the shoot date. I can be there.

I was REALLY hoping that this little detail of not going to the fitting, would not keep me from booking the role...but I decided to stop worrying about it. Either God was going to do this...or He wasn't. And if He wanted it to happen, even I couldn't screw it up.

Friday at the rehearsal dinner...I get the e-mail. I booked it. What a weekend that was. I book my first commercial, and my best friend gets married. Excellent!

The wedding went perfectly, and I made it back in time to shoot on Monday. We filmed for 12 hours, and it was a blast. 2 months later, the commercial Aired in GA, SC, and AL. It continued airing almost constantly for 2 months...and even aired during the SUPER BOWL!

Yes that's right...I was in a Super Bowl commercial (in GA, SC, and AL). Words cannot express how that felt...

Ok. I've rambled on long enough. If you're patient enough to have made it to the end of this post...here's the commercial. Enjoy!

Who are we when the cameras are off?

The Statue of Liberty was a gift from the people of France to the United States. It was created by Frédéric Bartholdi, and dedicated on October 28th, 1886.

Orville and Wilbur Wright are credited with inventing and creating the world's first successful airplane, and making their first flight on December 17th, 1903.

The statue of liberty stands 151 feet in the air, and was completed 17 years before human flight was achieved. It makes you wonder, were people considering the possibility that we would someday be able to fly over such a structure? Probably...I mean, DaVinci was developing "flying machines" (gliders) ca. 1500. Was the Statue of Liberty created with this in mind?

I heard a talk or a sermon recently, that linked the two events. The the talk was about quality. Doing things the way they should be done, even when you could realistically skimp on the details and no one would ever know. The focus of the talk, was the Statue of Liberty's hair.

At the time it was dedicated, no one would ever be able to see the statue from above, so what was the point of spending time on the hair? Wouldn't it be easier just to make the top of the head smooth? Heck, It could even be flat...or some slanted design that was good for drainage. I could easily picture someone saying "No need to worry about making the hair look realistic, no one's going to see that part."

Bartholdi did it anyway. He made the top of the statue's head look (somewhat) like hair. He did it right, even when it didn't make a whole lot of sense to do so. Who knows how much more it cost to make the hair? Here's a link to a picture of the Statue's hair from above.

While the talk was motivational, and raised some great points, I always tend to dig deeper. Maybe it was, in fact, cheaper to make the hair rather than making the head smooth. Maybe the striations actually aid in water drainage, so perhaps it was a 2-for-1 situation. Telescopes and binoculars were invented centuries before all of this...how tall were the buildings behind the statue? Could you see the hair from that vantage point? Perhaps Bartholdi thought of some of these questions, and decided there were too many variables, let's just make the hair.

I also found out that Bartholdi completed both the head and the torch-bearing arm before the statue was fully designed, and these pieces were exhibited for publicity at international expositions. Maybe he made the hair knowing the head would be on display long before the entire structure.

In light of all this, it seems logical that Bartholdi made the hair because there was a good chance someone would be able to see the top of the Statue's head at some point...but the question remains: Would Bartholdi have designed it with hair if none of these potential situations seemed possible? If he truly believed there to be no chance anyone would ever see the top of the statue's head, would he have bothered doing it "right"?

Who are we behind closed doors? Who are we when it's not easy to do the right thing, and we're certain we'd never get caught? Who are we when doing the right thing will go entirely unnoticed, and it is in fact the more difficult thing to do? Who are we when the "cameras are off"?

I recently received a lesson in this on the set of a TV show that's filmed here in Atlanta. I was an extra.

Now...the life of an extra is not a glamorous one. It may seem amazing (and to me, it is) to be on a TV or movie set, but it's often very difficult and tiresome. I've regularly spent 12-14 (sometimes even 16) hours on set. You're tired, you're bored, and you're getting paid $7.25-$9 an hour. Hardly a career.

Now don't get me wrong, I LOVE being on set. I truly come alive when the cameras are rolling and the director calls "action". There's nothing quite like it, even if I'm just a blurry figure in the background...but after 14 hours, your energy starts to fade. It's science.

When I first started working as an extra, I made a commitment to myself to do my job to the best of my ability every time, whether the camera is on me or not. When the director calls action, I'm going to ACT. Even if I know the camera is looking elsewhere. That's easy enough to say in hour #2, 5, even 9...but what about 15?

On this particular day, it was very late in the shoot, and I was beginning to become disillusioned. Long hours, Low pay, and little chance I'd actually be seen at all. There were many people there, and I looked to the camera to see where it was facing. No where near me. There was no chance I'd be in this shot.

The director called action, and I began to pantomime, (as they had told us to do) but not with the same gusto as I had in the first 14 hours. I half-assed it. It was hour 15. I was tired, hungry, and "knew" that I wasn't on camera. What's the big deal?

After the shot, the assistant director informed us that there was a second camera. A different angle. Many of us, who didn't think we were in the shot on Camera A, were in fact in the shot on Camera B. Apparently I hadn't been the only one who had been half-assing it.

It was a powerful lesson. I thought I had been out of the public eye. No one could see me, so what difference did it make? I learned that day, that even though I THOUGHT no one was watching, they were. And even if they weren't...you know what? I need to do it well regardless. Because it's the right thing to do. I want to be the guy who does things to 100% of my ability, because it's how it should be done...not because people are watching. I want to be a man of integrity even when it it seems justifiable not to be...even when it hurts.

Colossians 3:23 "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men."

Since that day, I believe I've done things to the best of my ability every time. Whether as an extra, or more recently as the lead in a couple short films. There have literally been times when the director said "you don't have to worry about doing it well this time, because the camera's not on you...it's on the other actor". But, I'm not doing it for me...or for the approval of man. I want to work at it with all my heart, as working for the Lord.

In the future, there will be times that I do things halfheartedly...it's inevitable. We're going to screw up. And at that point, I will ask God for forgiveness, accept the forgiveness that He offers, and move forward once again...thankful for His grace and mercy.

Where has the time gone?

For some reason my last post was listed as October 2010. It was actually some time in November. I fixed it on there. I started to get really nervous because I was having trouble recalling what I did for an entire month. Don't worry, got it figured out.

Since my time as an "extra" in The Vampire Diaries, and The Change-Up, the extra "well" has run dry a bit. A lot of random events prevented me from working on days that I might have otherwise been able to work. But, I did have an audition for an independent short film...Unfortunately I didn't get the part.

You'd think I would have been disappointed, but it really wasn't a big deal. I was proud of myself for going on the first audition I've been on in the past 10 years. I had forgotten how those things worked! In a book that I read about acting, it said that getting the audition is the success, not necessarily getting the part. Yes...obviously the goal of the audition is to get the part, but once you audition, you have no control over why they do or don't pick you. You could be too short, too tall, too blonde or too brunette. Your voice could be too high or your eyes could be too blue. In the case of a friend of mine, he auditioned for a feature film, and didn't get the role because his eyes weren't far enough apart. Sometimes it has nothing to do with your acting abilities what-so-ever.

After the audition, I was proud of myself for doing it. Could I have done better? Everything I do, I think of 19 ways I could have done better...I'm my worst critic. Could I have done worse? Of course. Over-all, it was definitely a success. I got the audition, did what they asked when they asked, said thank you, and I left.

Around that time, I found out that I got imdb credit for my first time in The Change-Up. If you click here and scroll down, you'll see me. I'm a Parks Department Employee...and I don't have a picture up. You have to pay for that sorta thing. A few days later I was an extra in The Change-Up again. Not as recognizable of a role as the first time, but it was fun to do.

In December, things started slowing down big time. Lots of productions started breaking for the holidays. So, sometime in mid-December I went to Philadelphia to help James move. This was no small task. It took us a little over a week of 5-6 hour days. Thousands of individual items that all had to be put in one of 5 categories: Sell, Keep, Store, Donate, or Throw Away. Here is a picture of James with a bunch of silver that we were cataloging for the estate sale.



We worked hard, and played hard. I had never been to Philadelphia before, nor had I really ever experienced "city life" so it was a great time. One weekend, James and I went to NYC for a night and a day. I got to see some great people that I worked with on The Help, and Campbell was there visiting as well. I haven't been to NYC since March 2001 (before 9-11...obviously) so it was great to see the city again as an adult.






Here's a picture of Campbell taking a picture of a bird in front of the Statue of Liberty. -->



















<-- A bald Eagle Statue with the Statue of Liberty in the background. I had a great time in New York and wish I could have stayed longer, but alas, James and I had a long journey ahead. We were leaving in 2 days to embark on a road trip from Philadelphia to Atlanta. This was our setup: 2 dudes, a 16 foot truck, a car on a trailer, and a cat. And yes...I'm allergic to cats.
It took us much longer than a normal road trip because we weren't supposed to go over 55mph. I'm not saying that's what we did....but we weren't supposed to. Otto (the cat) was surprisingly well behaved. Aside from the fact that he didn't like being inside his cat carrying bag.

We drove from Philadelphia to somewhere in North Carolina, then stayed in a hotel. The next day we drove the rest of the way to Atlanta, and straight to a storage unit where we filled a 10x10. It was a long trip. The next morning (Dec. 23rd) I drove down to Florida for Christmas, and have been here ever since.

I'll be honest, it's a confusing time right now. I'm not sure whether to make a more permanent move to Atlanta, or if LA is where I really need to be. I have some exciting potential opportunities in both places, but nothing that's a done deal. It doesn't seem smart to sign an apartment lease in either place at the moment. I've just been praying for some clarity...preferably in the form of a job...in the film industry. All I know is that I'm going to be in Atlanta for that audition on the 15th. A lot can happen between now and then.

Also, The Vampire Diaries starts back up Jan 27th, and I'm fairly certain it's the one I'm in. Feel free to watch it if you'd like, but don't get your hopes up....and don't blink!

What's Next?

Good question...I don't know.

I finished my time with The Help (click here for more info) sometime in early October. It was much too short; I didn't want it to end. I feel like I barely scratched the surface of the film industry, and then it became time for me to move on. I had no idea what I would do.

During my time with The Help I had the opportunity to really watch a movie being made. I've observed countless different jobs on set, and I'm beginning to narrow down the areas that I'd be interested in working. As I mentioned in previous blogs, my ultimate desire is to pursue acting once again. However, I've discovered that I'm also interested in the production side of things. I've also found that in this industry you don't have to be confined to just one thing. I like that.

I was considering a move to LA, but the timing just didn't feel right. I didn't have any money, no promise of a job, and truth be told, I've never actually been to LA. I didn't know what to expect. Plus, I didn't have any recent roles on my resume, aside from my experience as a Stand-In. The last role that I had was 10 years ago when I played RADAR in our High School Production of M*A*S*H. I know that I can still act, but I need to get some resume credits to prove it.

I started focusing my efforts on some cities in the South. I spent a few weeks in Memphis, went to the Indie Film festival, met some people, and checked out the opportunities. It became clear that most of the productions were elsewhere. In fact, I found out that the re-make of Footloose was between Memphis and Atlanta...and chose Atlanta. The same thing happened with The Blind Side back a year or 2 ago. Atlanta was quickly becoming a valid option.

My buddy James offered me a place to stay in Atlanta while I figured some things out. I started researching opportunities in Atlanta. I needed a reason to go.

I found my way to the Atlanta Film Commission website, and eventually saw an opportunity to be an Extra on MTV's new TV series "Teen Wolf". I sent them an e-mail, and a few days later they called me. I couldn't believe it. They wanted me to be a "student at a lacrosse game" for a 2 day shoot a few days from when they called. I started packing.

While I didn't know what I would do after Teen Wolf, I was hopeful. I knew that I just needed the opportunity to be there, and the next step would become clear. Would I make some connections and apply as a crew member? Would they need the services of an "experienced" stand in? would they scoop me out of the bleachers and put me in the show? unlikely, but I suppose crazier things have happened. It's fun to dream.

At Teen Wolf, I made some valuable connections with other Extras. Some of the people there had some incredible information on finding more work. There were e-mail addresses, facebook pages, websites, etc. None of which I had known about previously, and all of which were helpful. I wrote it all down.

It was the use of those resources that lead me to my next job. The Vampire Diaries. The extras casting people e-mailed me and asked me to work in a scene at a bar/grill. I would be the only Male bartender. I was excited.

I really enjoyed being a part of that production. I don't know that my face will ever actually be seen on screen, but I did have a slightly bigger part than in the other production. My job was to hand some coffee to the Sheriff and then make my way down the bar asking if the other patrons needed anything. Considering my experience as a bartender a few years ago, I felt right at home.

Someone that I met on the set of Vampire Diaries gave me another e-mail address. He told me that they were looking for extras tomorrow, and that I should apply ASAP. I e-mailed the production company, and received a phone call less than 30 minutes later.

As it turned out, what I had applied for was as an extra in a movie called "The Change Up" (click here for more details). I came to find out that the main characters in the movie are Ryan Reynolds and Jason Bateman. I was to be one of 4 "Parks Department" employees in a scene they were shooting tomorrow. I had no idea what to expect.

God smiled on me this day. It was an awesome experience. I was given a desk at a "DMV" type office at the Parks Department, and told to look bored and somewhat busy. As they began to set up the scene, I quickly realized that I was going to be right behind the action. In a scene with Jason Bateman, Ryan Reynolds, and another actress who is playing a Parks Department employee. When the camera shows her, I'm pretty sure you'll be able to see me. I'll probably be blurry, and you better not blink...but if you pause the movie at just the right moment...you might be able to see my arm. haha kidding, I haven't seen the footage yet so I have no idea what to expect.

That day was bitter sweet, because when I went to go get my car (because I was going to be driving it in the next scene) I found that I had gotten broken in to. It was clear that whoever it was, was going for a laptop bag. Luckily the bag was mostly empty. They only took a webcam, but broke my window.

robbery in a parking garage

It could have been a whole lot worse. You may not be able to tell, but I had approximately half my life in my car at the moment of the break in. Plenty of expensive things that could have gotten stolen...and all they took was a webcam. I actually felt really blessed. Then I had to call the movie people and tell them I couldn't make it for the next scene.

The movie people were very understanding, and felt terrible. They took down my information to keep in touch, at which point I asked them about working for the movie. They gave me an address to e-mail my resume. If this break-in leads to a job working on another movie...I'd say it's a win.

Last night I had another small job for a BET show called "The Game". I was part of a group of paparazzi. I doubt I'll ever actually be seen on camera, but it was fun, and a good experience.

So here I am again, back to square 1. I suppose I'm going to have to get used to it; that's the way this business works. Right now I'm hoping to get a job on a crew (Production Assistant or set dresser?) for a movie or TV show. I'd really like to get an actual audition for something...preferably something that PAYS...but let's not get greedy. It seems that God has been illuminating ONLY the very next step, and in His own time. Sometimes I don't even know what I'll be doing tomorrow. It's been quite the adventure.

Matthew 6:34 "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

Since I arrived

Wanted to give an update on the movie situation. There has been so much happening that I could write for days...but I'll try to summarize.

Week 1:
A few days in Memphis spending time with Sam, Mariet, & their baby William. Then I traveled to Mississippi to start meeting people working on the movie. Campbell was still down there, his last day would be Friday. I was fortunate enough to meet all the people that Campbell had told me about, and his boss told me that he could use me for a week in mid September. I was excited for the chance to be working on the movie...but I'd believe it when I saw it!

I also found my way to the casting office, where the two ladies casting all the extras looked at me like I was an answered prayer. Apparently they had been looking for a blonde guy to be a stand in. I didn't know that I was blonde, or what a stand in was, but I was willing to hear more.

The 3 days I spent there ended with Campbell and I finding ourselves in a stretch limo driving to Clarksdale to go to Morgan Freeman's bar "Ground Zero".

That weekend I went back to Memphis because it was Sam's birthday, and I didn't have any reason to stay in Mississippi. I was quite bothered by the fact that I had left there without any reason to be back until September 18th.

Week 2:
Labor Day Monday, and then Tuesday came around. I was pretty discouraged on Tuesday...I had no reason to go back to Mississippi. No where to stay, and no way to justify spending money on a motel. That's when I got a phone call from the casting office. They wanted me to be a stand in on Wednesday and Thursday. In probably the only time I've ever been at a loss for words in my life, here was the entire phone conversation:

Jenn: "Hi Steven, this is Jenn from casting, I'm calling to see if you'd like to be a stand in tomorrow and thursday?"
Steven: "yes"
Jenn: "Ok.... I'll e-mail you the details of where to be and when. I think your call time is 7am. Have you ever been a stand in before?"
Steven: "no"
Jenn: "Ok...well just get there a little early and ask one of the experienced stand ins what you need to be doing. Look forward to seeing you tomorrow."
-click.

I was dumbfounded. I just got offered a job to work on a movie. Nevermind the fact that I don't really know what a stand in does, what I'm supposed to wear, what a "call time" is. That's all secondary...I'm going to be working on a major motion picture...tomorrow.

A stand in is someone who takes the place of the actor while the rest of the crew is setting up the shot. You literally just sit/stand there while the camera crew focuses the cameras on you, the lighting crew gets the lighting right. The props crew puts food in front of you, etc. You get to watch the entire room move like a living organism from the center of their attention. It is fascinating.

Whenever they aren't doing a scene with your character(s) in it, you just wait till they need you. You read, listen to music, eat free (and awesome) food, play video games, whatever. What I chose to do, was just watch. Everything and Anything that I could watch. I'd often stand behind the producers and directors as they watched the film on the monitors...being careful not to get in anyone's way. Everyone there is working; they don't have time to chit chat.

Being a stand in was an incredible experience. You get all the benefit of watching how a movie is put together with VERY little responsibility. I was able to see jobs that I would like to do, and ones that I wouldn't. It was like a crash course in film making from a "fly on the wall" perspective.

That Thursday evening, after they finished shooting, I was praying for a reason to stay. A job, a social gathering, whatever. I just needed a reason not to go back to Memphis just yet. I was explaining my predicament to a friend on the phone, when I walked into a coffee shop and saw one of the actors. He was a guy that Campbell had put me in touch with, and we'd been trying to connect for the past few days. He asked what I was doing later (nothing of course) and invited me to come have a beer with him and some of the guys.

What I eventually found out was that "some of the guys" turned out to be 12-15 of the principal actors/actresses. I spent the next few hours meeting the people who are IN the movie. One of the actors is a Christian...and we had an awesome conversation. He's someone who I will undoubtedly keep in touch with.

I spent the night in Mississippi, and then headed back to Memphis the next day.

Week 3:
More of the same! I spoke with the casting office before I left the week before, and they asked me to stand in again on Thursday and Friday. It was a new location this time with a lot of outdoor shots. Once again I watched the magic happen as often as possible and spoke with people who are working on the movie as much as I could. I want to know what their lives are like working in the movie business.

I had been really looking for a place to stay if my time in Mississippi was to continue, but was fine with staying in a motel for the time being. One of the days that I was on set, I met one of the producers. He asked where I was from, how I was liking being on the movie, etc. When he found out that I came down from Colorado, he asked where I was staying. I told him, and he then offered a room in the house that they have. The room just opened up. I wasn't able to take the room at the time (because I was about to start work on the set crew) but I really hope it works out when I get back!

Ok...so that brings us to present day. Week 4. I started working on the set crew last Saturday. What a blessing it has been.

It's tough work, we've had some 12 hour days, and some late nights, but they've treated us really well. They paid for everyone to have their own hotel room, gave us "per diem" money for food and entertainment, and the hourly wage ain't too shabby. Not to mention overtime...

As I mentioned before, set dressers set up the scene before the filming begins at that location. We started with a soda fountain type drug store. We cleared everything out that we didn't need, labeled it, and boxed it up. Then we brought in all the old stuff (1960's paraphernalia) and got to work. I worked on a toy display, sewing display, front counter/cash register. Products on shelves, pills in the pharmacy...you name it I probably touched it.

This job is not for people who get discouraged easily. There were PLENTY of times when I'd spend 30 mins-1hr on some project only to have it moved 20 mins later. All the while, I was thinking about how little you will actually see of this on the silver screen. Maybe not at all. But none of that matters. It's all part of making the movie happen. They can't film there unless we do all those meticulous little things to make the set look incredible. You've got to make sure the pharmacy looks like a 1960's pharmacy...even if it's 30 feet behind the actors. It all matters...and none of it matters at the same time. What a crazy industry.

The next couple of days we continued to work on the drug store and we started a street. An entire street of window displays. A gas station, theater, bakery, paint shop, hardware store, dry cleaners, etc. 10 stores in all I believe.

So I've spent the past 7 days working my tail off setting up scenes, then they'd film it, and then we'd take it down. Today was our last day.

I was told that they only needed me for a week, but the boss asked if I wanted to work for another week. Yet another blessing. God has been so good in all of this.

Forgive the fact that I'm being candid, I'm not entirely sure how much information I'm allowed to share. Pretty sure that I can tell you that the movie I'm working on is called "The Help." It's based on a book by Kathryn Stockett. Check it out on IMDb: The Help

Thank you for all your encouraging words and prayers. I'll do my best to keep you posted.

I never know what he's doing...

Sorry it's been so long since my last post. I've had a lot going on that I wish I would have written about, but not the time to do it.

About a month ago, I decided to take a leap of faith.

As many of you know, as a kid I was a child actor/model. My parents got me started as a model when I was 1 or 2 years old. We lived in Chicago at the time. I was in a number of print advertisements as well as a few commercials. Here is a picture of me in a Lee Jeans ad:


Many of you are thinking "what a cute kid...what happened?" I ask myself the same question all the time.

Anyway, as I got older, I began auditioning for movies. Although I got "called back" often, I was never actually in one. It wasn't until I was in 4th grade that I actually started acting. My 4th grade music teacher sent a letter home to my mother suggesting that I audition for a role in the high school musical at the school near by. They were looking for a 4th-6th grade boy soprano. Yes, I was a soprano before my voice changed.

I auditioned for the role as Colin in the Secret Garden and I got the part. For the next few months, I rehearsed along side the high schoolers in the show and eventually performed for audiences up to 2000 people. It was an incredible experience. My mom remembered that during one of the rehearsals I turned to her and said "mom...I was made for this. I LOVE this."

From there, I continued to be involved in local and (one time) professional theater. I was involved in children's choirs, theater productions, and continued to audition for movies. At that point, I knew. I wanted to be an actor.

However, it was during the professional play that I was in (Camelot) that I realized something about the other actors. THEY were professional actors. That's what they did...for their job. They couldn't have been making a ton of money. They certainly weren't famous. It was then that my perspective started to shift. I didn't want to be doing THAT for the rest of my life.

As I grew older, my desire to be "rich" began to overshadow my desire to be an actor. We moved to Memphis when I was 13, and the quality of theater productions just didn't compare to those in Chicago. Everything seemed "B rate" compared to what I had been involved in before. I continued acting and singing at "half-steam" throughout High School.

When it came time for college, I had no idea what I would do with my life...but I was fairly sure it wasn't acting. I knew by this point that it was an extremely difficult business to get in to, and for every 1 actor who was rich and famous, there were thousands that were struggling.

In the midst of all my college applications, I drove up to Miami of Ohio and auditioned as a Vocal Performance Major. I received a sizable scholarship...but didn't take it. "What am I going to do with a vocal performance degree?? be a music teacher?" no no....I wanted to actually make money.

I got accepted to the University of Georgia, and decided that's where I would go. It was a beautiful campus. I still had no idea what I wanted to do. While I was at Georgia, I was involved in the Men's Glee club. I thoroughly enjoyed my time there, but began convincing myself that it was time to cast that part of my life aside.

I eventually transferred to the University of Tennessee because of the Tennessee Lottery Scholarship that I was eligible for. I knew when I was transferring that I was finished with singing and acting all together.

At UT, I worked toward a degree in finance. I began working part time for an investment firm in Knoxville when I was a junior. I worked 15-20 hrs a week, and although I didn't LOVE it...I was convinced that once I was doing it full-time I would really enjoy it. I seemed to think that once It was my REAL job, I'd suddenly develop an interest in things like reading the Wall Street Journal.

When I graduated, they offered me a full-time job as an investment analyst. I quickly realized that what I didn't enjoy doing for 15-20 hours a week, I was now doing for 40. Part of me attempted to dive deeper into the financial world, while the other part of me was screaming for a way out.

6 months after I began working full-time (summer 2008), an opportunity arose at a Young Men's ministry in Colorado Springs. It was clear that it was the right move...so I jumped at the chance. I spent 3 months at a program called Training Ground which focuses on Work, Wilderness, and Worship. It undoubtedly was the vessel in which God used to change my life.

From there, I spent some time working at a decorative concrete surface company owned by a Mentor of mine in Knoxville. 8 months later, the guys at Training Ground asked me to be come on staff as an intern, and eventually the Assistant Director.

Over the past year at Training Ground, I've had a lot of time for self-reflection and pursuing my relationship with The Lord. Last October, I began to notice that God was stirring up certain desires in my heart. Desires to pursue entertainment again. I began praying about having an opportunity to sing in church or act in a local theater.

About a week later, a friend of mine called and asked me if I would sing in his wedding. "no way" I told him. There was no way I was ready for such a task. I hadn't sang on a stage in about 5 years. I eventually told him "I'd think about it."

It wasn't long before I realized that the opportunity I had been praying for...was right in front of my face. I reluctantly said yes.

It was this past January that my friend Todd got married to Christin, and I sang "I Will Be Here" by Steven Curtis Chapman. I was extremely nervous when they asked me to sing at the wedding rehearsal, but about halfway through the song I calmed down. It was like riding a bike. I had done this hundreds of times before...and I suddenly remembered: "I love this."

Since then, I've been actively praying and considering a career in entertainment. Not necessarily as an actor, but that's my primary passion. I have ALWAYS wanted to work in movies. That was my ultimate desire in all of it, and I wanted to know what the business was like. I began researching in any way I could. Reading books, making contact with actors. I wanted to know what life is like in the Movie Business.

Also in January, a Training Ground Alumni (who would quickly become a close friend) moved out to Colorado Springs. His name is Campbell Brewer. I told him that I was thinking about getting back into acting, and he admitted that he had secretly always been interested in film. We began making short films http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cbr0E0fZIgc, and even doing things like podcasts http://reddbrew.podbean.com/. Even if nothing ever came of it, we were having a lot of fun.

In June, Campbell visited Tennessee for his brother's wedding. While in TN, he got wind of a movie that they were filming near by. He came down to see about being an extra in the film. Through a contact that he had, he eventually met the Set Director of the film, and was offered a job on the Set Dressing crew. I was jealous.

As 2 months went by, I sat in inner turmoil out in Colorado. I desperately wanted to be a part of the film. I would talk to Campbell on a weekly basis and hear about all the things he's seen and experienced. Every time I talked to him, I asked him if there were any job openings, and every time he told me "I'm sure you can get hired...you just have to come down here." I just couldn't take that risk.

Then, about a month ago, some things changed in my life. Doors seemed to be closing for me in Colorado, and I was becoming ready to leave. One day, I was speaking to Campbell on the phone and telling him about all the difficult things that were going on around me. He began telling me some awesome stories that were happening on the set. All of a sudden, in a moment of clarity, I thought to myself "what the heck am I still doing here?!" I asked Campbell (as I always did) if there were any jobs available. He answered (as he always did) "I'm sure we can get you a job...my boss will just want to know when you can be here." I said "two weeks."

"What?!" Campbell replied.
"2 weeks." I repeated. "If there is a job available, I can be there in 2 weeks."
"Really?! well...ok. I'll ask my boss!" Campbell answered.

And thus began the journey. Campbell asked his boss, and his boss told him that he'd be needing people for a week or two in September. That was good enough for me (barely). I was obviously hoping to work for the rest of the shoot, but I thought "who knows what might happen, God will be with me no matter what." I just needed to get down there.

So I left. I packed up my entire life in my Ford explorer, and headed down south. That was 2 weeks ago, and let me tell you...it's been an incredible experience already.

A Fly Fishing Trip Becomes an Adventure

About a month ago, Jeff Stelzner, his brother Dan, Campbell, Ryan, and I set out for a fly fishing trip in the black canyon. It looked as though the weather was going to be very cold and rainy, but we went anyway.

We had to take Jeff's truck, because from what he remembered, we would need 4 wheel drive, especially if it was raining. On the way out there, as we traveled over the mountains, it was literally snowing. I started to wonder if I was well enough prepared for this trip, but was comforted when we descended in altitude and the snow turned to rain.

There is a 7 mile dirt road that leads to the trail head, but because of all the rain it was extremely muddy. Jeff drove the seven miles with extreme care. We were all nervously looking out the windshield. There were a few times when Jeff would turn the wheel and the truck would continue to go straight. Not a good thing when you're driving into a canyon.

We made it to the trail head (barely) and camped under some of the picnic shelters.Jeff's truck the next morning

It was wet, cold, and rainy but we all stayed dry. In the morning, we ate a quick breakfast, and set out for the bottom of the canyon.

From everything we could tell before the trip, the water levels in the river were going to be higher than normal. Maybe up to 2000 cubic feet/second where as 800 seems to be pretty normal. However, when we reached the bottom of the canyon, we quickly realized that it was more like 3500-4000cfs. The river was very high. In fact, the trail that we were going to follow up to the campsite was completely submerged.

We traveled up as far as we could, but eventually couldn't go any farther. Jeff had brought a small inflatable raft and some string (to pull it back) in case we'd need to cross the river. We decided to cross to the other side where there appeared to be a great campsite.

Inflating the boat

Each guy would get in the raft with his own backpack and cross the fast moving river. Jeff crossed the river with ease, laying on his back in the raft and paddling backwards. Dan had a more difficult time with that method, and as the string was exiting my hands, I had to quickly tie on section of rope so that it would reach the other side. In the end, we had to let go of the rope. To my surprise, the knot held, but even with two sections of rope, we didn't have enough for Dan to make it all the way across. In the end Jeff had to re-cross the river to bring us the boat.

When it was my turn to cross, I decided to lay on my stomach and paddle forward. Campbell and Ryan used the same method. We all made it to the other side swiftly and safely.

The fishing wasn't great, but just being down in the canyon was incredible. If I ever got frustrated with the fishing, I would just sit and take in the view. The canyon walls were 800-1000 feet above where I was standing. The river was a beautiful green color. It was simply amazing. It was pretty rainy at first, but cleared up as the day went on.

By the end of the day, I had somehow caught 2 fish. Everyone else caught one except for Ryan who had napped in the sun for most of the day. As far as I was concerned, the fishing was just a bonus to an already incredible experience.

Me in the black canyon

casting

The next day we woke up early and fished for a few hours before we needed to cross over the river and head back. We started crossing about 12.

I made it over much more easily than the first time, as did Ryan. Dan tried laying on his stomach this time. It was easier for him than the first time, but still difficult to make it across. Jeff was holding the rope on the other side and had to run down the river with the boat so that the rope wouldn't run out.

Jeff retrieving the boat after Ryan's crossing

By the time Dan made it over, Jeff had let out all the string and was into the rope that I had tied on during the last crossing experience.

Dan's crossing, Ryan and I on the other side

As Dan pushed the raft out into the river, the knot in the string and rope failed. We had never checked it. None of us thought we would need to. The raft started floating down river.

Jeff immediately took off after it, scrambling to the best of his ability down the side of the river. I did the same on my side. I was wearing waders, so I could jump into the water and trudge through. Jeff eventually came to an impasse, and jumped into the water. He realized it was futile, and headed back to the shore.

I continued on until I slipped on a rock (full speed) and banged my hip on another rock in the water. I decided that I was finished running, and would simply watch, hoping that the raft would get beached or stuck on something. To my dismay, I watched as the raft disappeared over the rapids. It was gone.

As it was, Ryan, Dan and I were on the correct side of the river. Campbell and Jeff were stuck on the other side. Now we were faced with the task of figuring out how to get Campbell and Jeff...and their backpacks...back to the proper side. I yelled out a few ideas, but for the most part it was up to them. They started brainstorming.

They decided to make a raft out of wood and thermarest sleeping pads.

Raft of wood and thermarest mattresses

As I waited for them to build the raft, I decided to move downstream. What was mere hours, seemed like days as I waited for them to execute their plan. I tried to think of any other way for them to cross but came up with nothing. The best I could do was wait downstream. That way if they lost hold of their gear, I could jump in to save it as a last line of defense.

I probably waited there for 30 minutes before Ryan started heading my way. As he neared me, he yelled something. I couldn't understand him over the rushing water. "What? I can't hear you..." I kept saying. Finally I heard him say "KAYAKERS!" and point towards the trail. I turned around but saw nothing. "WHERE?" I yelled. He answered but once again I couldn't make out what he was saying. I kept looking to where he was pointing but saw nothing. Finally, a flash of red came from behind some of the brush. Ryan was right, there were people over there. Kayakers. Maybe they could help. I put my waders back on and started making my way towards them.

I soon realized that they were only minutes away from paddling down the rapids. I had to run again. Rock scrambling, running through the water in my waders, and occasionally finding some solid ground. I was about 50 feet from where I could see the kayakers, when I slipped again (at full speed), this time banging my shin on a rock. I hobbled through the rest of the brush, and yelled to the kayakers, just as two of them were entering the rapids.

The other two paddled up to me. In between gasping breaths, I explained the situation. The young woman, asked the guy if he minded going down the rapids alone. He reluctantly agreed, and she agreed to help in whatever way she could.

She paddled up stream and Ryan directed her to Campbell and Jeff. I limped back to where Ryan was, and sat down. I could finally breathe. It seemed as though we had a solution to our problem.

More time passed. I didn't know what could be taking so long. I kept looking nervously upstream for some sign of something happening. I would have walked up there, but my shin was throbbing me. It felt like someone had hit it with a hammer. I was content in that I felt like my part in all of this was finished. I had done what I could.

As I saw the kayaker paddling across the river, I realized that they had tied their makeshift raft to the back of her kayak, and she was towing it across. In a burst of excitement, I ran back up to meet her on the other side of the river.

I helped her untie the gear, gratefully thanked her, and pulled out the video camera. I got some great footage as Campbell and Jeff dove in the freezing water and swam across.

We made our way to the trailhead and I took off my waders. Apparently when I had hit my shin, my knee had split open. The waders were fine, but my knee was bleeding and stuff was hanging out. No wonder it had been hurting so badly.

My knee after the injury

Jeff (an EMT) bandaged me up, and I hobbled my way up the trail with a 30 lb pack. Our adventure was over.